Saying Goodbye

It's always difficult to move into late fall because I know what is coming. Closing the camper signifies the shifting. It's the time of year when the leaves are falling, though still beautiful, and the nights are colder. 

I've waited nearly ten months to get into the specialist here and yesterday, with plans in place to go home for a week, I got the call. Monday. Even as I listened to the receptionist, inside I was thinking I would cancel it. I've been here before and never gotten help. Short of corrective, fairly new and uncertain surgery I have to live with a pancreatic defect which affects my ability to digest food. What will make this time any different?

Yet today, in the midst of totes and the messes of packing up a camper and all my stuff, I pray. Should I cancel this appointment, Lord and go home?

I feel the quiet nudge and hear "green light." 

Yesterday as I was listening to Graham Cooke and traveling, he was saying God has given us a green light to keep going forward, until he gives us a red light. I know that even now He can change the appointment, but I must move forward at this green light and trust. 

After lunch, hubby went out to wash the camper. I made my way through the totes and bags and lay down on the couch with my book. Soon I was asleep. My body reminds me of the problems within today and I rest until the ringing phone awakes me. 

What will spring look like in my life? These golden wet leaves will be ready to rake where we leave them and that is all I know for sure. 

Grateful today for:

Naps

Peaceful afternoons

The sound of hubby outside working 

Tinkling chimes with a message from my sons 

Lily's dance with a friend